You feel like a dream that never came true,
I am constantly chasing you,
Searching, for your presence.
But they took you too soon.
Every time my heart beats,
It whispers your name,
And proceeds to break into a million pieces.
I pick them up, hesitantly trying to put them back together.
I have to.
But deep down inside,
I want it to remain broken.
It’s the only way I know how to remember you.
You are all the pain concentrated at the very middle of my chest.
Hand to heart, I can feel you.
But in my mind,
You have never existed.
You are just an empty space.
I am slowly dying,
Trying to fill you.
But nothing, no one is good enough.
Only you, will suffice.
But I cannot have you,
so I will keep this emptiness,
And somehow find joy in it.
Who am I kidding,
I don’t know joy without you.
I don’t even know the girl in the mirror,
Without you.
The least you could have done,
was to tell me who I am.
But you left all the questions folded in my hands.
They have been folded since.
I need the answers that you took with you,
I need them to let go,
I need them to unfold my hands,
Maybe then, I can finally give something of myself.
But what is there to give,
When my head is so stuck in the clouds.
What is there to give,
When all I am, is the girl in the mirror.
A SHAMEFUL THING 